Sunday, February 28, 2010

Hell-O Eastern Medicine!!!

I gotta say - I have had luck in the past with most eastern medicine - i.e. herbal supplements, vitamins, etc. I have had little to NO luck in the past with relying on doctors to help me with the things that docs consider -- insignificant.
I don't know where you stand, but, for me, being in a depressive state for nearly all of the time between 15 and 31 is NOT an insignificant problem. I am not talking about just bein' a little blue here. I'm talking about deeply depressed, borderline dangerous - for me- frame of mind. Docs don't care. They would not care, unless I had a kitchen knife stickin' out of my forehead.
That don't sound to comfy to me, or realistically a proper solution to my bad frame of mind.
When it started, it was pawned off on 'oh, just a teenager'. Then, I always felt like it was something that should not be talked about - like there was a shame that went with being miserable. Just what I needed - shame on top of self loathing.
After the kids came along - even though there was a gap between kiddo no. 1 and losing baby no.2, docs chalked it up to postpartum depression. OK, so, what about during the pregnancy? I'll buy postpartum for some of the after, but 5 years of postpartum? Come on. Get real, docs.
Of course I was upset when I miscarried. And depressed & nervous the whole pregnancy for kiddo no.2, but really? where's the happy? Few moments. Moments.
Now, long story short, over the past 5 years or so, I have been had my thyroid levels tested 3 times - as ordered by a doc, because apparently, low thyroid levels can be to blame for depression - amongst other problems I have as well. I had some hope that this last test would yield some results that could help me - BUT, for some reason, the complete panel that was ordered --- was NOT done. They only did a general scan, which, I 'passed' by less than a tenth of a point. The lab refused to finish the test. So, this was my third borderline test result.
I am so discouraged by doctors at this point, I don't think I will ever go again, unless it's totally necessary. I could understand if ONE of 3 tests was borderline, to ignore it. But all 3? WOW.
I was angry. I was hurt (don't ask me why but I took it quite personally) and I was so very very discouraged. Then I said screw them. I KNOW there's a problem. It may not be major, but it must be enough to screw me up - at least a little!!!
So, I have taken matters into my own hands.
I'm goin' Eastern Medicine. Herbals. Aromatherapy. Sun Worshipping. All that sillly hippie shit.
And you know what? Not even a week, and I am .... happy. I haven't cried in days. I smile all the time. I am thankful for all that is going on in our little family, and for the first time in years, I am not filled with total self loathing. I am relaxed, calm, and I can feel my energy levels rising.
All this on a week when, well, without getting to personal, I should be feeling more like crap, not better.
Just wanted to share. And, remind everyone that if you aren't getting satisfaction from your docs, it's not always bad to take matters into your own hands. After all, they don't care. They don't. It's not a big critique, it's just the truth. If it's not an emergency - they couldn't give a rat's ass. That's all. Thanks for listening :)

4 comments:

  1. I am glad you are finding a way to feel better. I was tested for thyroid stuff for years with everything looking fine, but I knew it was not. My gynecologist did some different tests and found me to be as bad off as he had ever seen. Amazing what happens when you feel better--even a little vindicated.

    My GP now is awesome, and stays on top of all this for me, but I have to admit, he has been a rarity over the years

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  2. If you really want to go Eastern, I STRONGLY suggest accupuncture. Best way to feel fab and well I've ever found.

    Course, I'm also now permanently on happy pills, so I don't go nearly as often as I used to. I like my happy pills, and no one better take them away!

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  3. Hi Kim, you remember now that I am that dirt loving, tree hugging hippie friend of yours LOL Good for you in finding alternative treatments. That just pisses me off when doctors don't listen or care about what you know is a problem. I fully believe that we know our own bodies best since we have lived with them all our lives. Good luck with the new treatments. It sounds like they are working wonders. PS Try moon bathing. It is wondiferous too. :)

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  4. Yes, yes I do remember, Jess! I went through a hippie phase for a while, it just wasn't the best fit for me ;) I do have mad love for alternative ways of dealing with things - which is why my mind went immediately to herbs. I will do the moon bathing - in a way, I now realize that I used to do it all the time, I just have not in recent years!

    Jen, yes, I think I will try some accupuncture when I get a little mad cash burning a hole in my pocket. I'd also like to try out reiki too.

    Paige - you are one lucky lady to have such a considerate doc. I WISH that I could find one that wasn't so superior that they knew more about me because they read a file for 30 seconds. lol. I'll keep up the good fight!! Thanks y'all for the encouragement!!!

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